Looking back at a fair chunk of my recent reading (Lily and the Octopus, On the Other Side, Language of Dying, The Empathy Problem) and I’m sensing a bit of a theme. To be frank I seem to be getting through a lot of stories about aging and death. Some of this may be because as I, and my family, get older the ideas of being old and dying start to become less a matter of theory and more of an inevitability. Obviously I’d prefer it if I (and all those who mean a lot to me) could avoid death for a good long while but there is no way to stop time flying like an arrow (or, in the end, its effects on the body and mind). I don’t have a problem with getting older – although I do wish my hair would hurry up past the steely grey stage and get to that lovely Judi Dench silvery white – and I’m certainly too lazy/scared to bother with surgical interventions or magic potions. I’d say I want to grow old gracefully but it would be the first graceful thing I’ve done in my life…
The Secret Diary of Hendrik Groen is a Dutch bestseller, written from the point of view of an elderly man living in an Amsterdam old folks home. Hendrik Groen is a pseudonym and there has been a huge amount of speculation over who he actually is – a famous writer, a comedian or maybe, just maybe, an actual octogenarian. As Hendrik says himself “Nothing is a lie, but not everything is true”. I’m not sure his identity matters because what he has written seems to be so real: in a way that most stories about the older generations usually aren’t. In the world of fiction the elderly always seem to be either having unlikely adventures ( like Allan Karlsson or Harold Fry) or they are passive characters there to act as a foil to younger, more active protagonists. Possibly by imparting wisdom and then dying (like Yoda….) but this book seems to more of a warts and all view of everyday life in a residential home. Or maybe a warts, and incontinence, and nose hair, and Alzheimer’s and all view.
Over the course of a year we meet Hendrik, his friends (the wonderfully named Old-But-Not-Dead club which includes the incorrigible Evert and sensible Eefje) and less pleasant contemporaries in the care home. Bullying, it seems, is ageless. We are also introduced to staff – the sympathetic and the more mercenary – and to the everyday joys, frustrations, challenges and sorrows of an often forgotten group. We see that friendships, respect and love are still important and, of course, this should come as no surprise. The elderly still have the same interests they always did (and just think, our care homes today are now filling up with Mods, Rockers, Punks and Flower Children), there is the same range of interests and beliefs as in the population at large. Of course some older people (and many younger ones too) want to look only to the past – Hendrik and his friends are a group who retain the ability to look around themselves and to look forward. He muses on Dutch politics, world events, pap television and health with wit and without taking any prisoners. There are plenty of laugh out loud moments, quite a few home truths about attitudes to the older generations and, inevitably, sorrow. I’m pleased to hear that a second volume has been published in the Netherlands – I’m thinking of adopting Hendrik Groen as my new Dad and I want to hear as many stories as he wants to tell.